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• 10. "It's like you're a big bird with radar and I'm tired of getting hit!" --Frank Napier
• 09. "The disappointment here is you!" --Frank Napier
• 08. The Lord said, do whatever you have to do, and he didn't say 'Joe, be polite.'" --Joe Clark
• 07. "Girl! I look at you and I want that oochie coochie." --Thomas Sams
• 06. "Discipline is not the enemy of enthusiasm!" --Joe Clark
• 05. "They used to call me Crazy Joe. Well now they can call me Batman!" --Joe Clark (holding a baseball bat)
• 04. "You're substituting my bosoms for your mothers. . . Why not what's wrong with my bosoms?" --Lexie Littleton
• 03. "Maybe they'll just kind of adjust to me." --Carter Rutherford
• 02. "Can you hear me? Good! You are NOT inferior! Your grades may be, your school may have been. But you can turn that around and make liars out of those bastards in exactly one hour when you take that test and pass it and win! So here's what I want you to do. When you find your thoughts wandering, I want you to knuckle back down and concentrate. Concentrate! Remember what's at stake and show them what East Side High's all about: a spirit that will not die!" --Joe Clark
• 01. "We sink, we swim, we rise, we fall - We meet our fate together." --Joe Clark

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